The tears in my eyes I can wipe away, the ache in my heart will always stay
My Mom is a Survivor
My Mom is a survivor,
or so I've heard it said.
But I can hear her crying at night
when all others are in bed.
I watch her lay awake at night
and go to hold her hand.
She doesn't know I'm with her
to help her understand.
But like the sands on the beach
that never wash away ...
I watch over my surviving Mom
who thinks of me each day.
She wears a smile for others ...
a smile of disguise!
But through Heaven's door
I see tears flowing from her eyes.
My Mom tries to cope with death;
To keep my memory alive.
But anyone who knows her knows
it is her way to survive.
As I watch over my surviving Mom
through Heaven's open door ...
I try to tell her that angels
protect me forevermore!
I know that doesn't help her,
or ease the burden she bears.
So, if you get a chance, go visit her.
Show her that you care.
For no matter what she says ...
no matter what she feels.
My surviving Mom has a broken heart
that time won't ever heal.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Cord
We are connected,
My child and I, by
An invisible cord
Not seen by the eye.
It's not like the cord
That connects us 'til birth
This cord can't been seen
By any on Earth.
This cord does it's work
Right from the start.
It binds us together
Attached to my heart.
I know that it's there
Though no one can see
The invisible cord
From my child to me.
The strength of this cord
Is hard to describe.
It can't be destroyed
It can't be denied.
It's stronger than any cord
Man could create
It withstands the test
Can hold any weight.
And though you are gone,
Though you're not here with me,
The cord is still there
But no one can see.
It pulls at my heart
I am bruised...I am sore,
But this cord is my lifeline
As never before.
I am thankful that God
Connects us this way
A mother and child
Death can't take it away!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dearest Mommy,
When you wonder the meaning
of life and love
Know that I am with you
Close your eyes and feel me kissing you
in the gentle breeze across your cheek
When you begin to doubt that you shall ever see me again
Quiet your mind and hear me
I am in the whisper of the heavens
Speaking of your love
When you lose your identity
When you question who you are
where you are going
Open your heart and see me
I am the twinkle in the stars
smiling down upon you
Lighting the path for your journey
When you awaken each morning
Not remembering your dreams
But feeling content and serene
Know that I was with you
Filling your night with thoughts of me
When you linger in the remnant pain
Wholeness seeming so unfamiliar
Think of me
Know that I am with you
Touching you thru the shared tears of a gentle friend
Easing the pain
As the sunrise illuminates the desert sky
In that breathtaking brilliance, awaken your spirit
Think of our time together, all too brief, but ever brilliant
When you were certain of us, together
When you were certain of your destiny.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What a Grieving Parent Really Thinks
Hello, Old Friend,
Oh, yes, you know
I lost my child a while ago.
No, no please
Don’t look away
And change the subject
It’s ok.
You see, at first I couldn’t feel,
It took so long, but now it’s real.
I hurt so much inside you see
I need to talk,
Come sit with me?
You see, I was numb for so very long,
And people said, “My, she is so strong.”
They did not know I couldn’t feel,
My broken heart made all unreal.
But then one day, as I awoke
I clutched my chest, began to choke,
Such a scream, such a wail,
Broke from me…
My child! My child!
The horror of reality.
But everyone has moved on, you see,
everyone except for me.
Now, when I need friends most of all,
Between us there now stands a wall.
My pain is more than they can bear,
When I mention my child,
I see their blank stare.
“But I thought you were over it,”
Their eyes seem to say,
No, no, I can’t listen to this, not today.
So I smile and pretend, and say, “Oh, I’m ok”.
But inside I am crying, as I turn away.
And so my old friend, I shall paint on a smile,
As I have from the start,
You never knowing all the while,
All I’ve just said to you in my heart.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Pair of Shoes
Author Unknown
I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
Uncomfortable shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
They are looks of sympathy.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes. There are many pairs in this world.
Some parents are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.
No one deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger person.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a parent who has lost a child.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Today It Hurt…
Today it hurt like yesterday... tomorrow will be the same
Only the day and date will change... the rest will all remain
When someone asks me how I am... or what it is I do?
The answers to those questions are... I wish I were with you
There is no way to explain this pain... or how it is I feel
I try to get up every day... and somehow try to deal
Although it seems as if I'm fine ...I've learned how to just hide
I place a mask upon my face... and keep it deep inside
I cry when no one is around... can't face what they might say
I have heard so many hurtful words... I have felt so very betrayed
They think time heals everything...but that just is not true
I know I will not heal...being left here without you
Each morning when I wake up...the sorrow is still here
I wish this was some big mistake... that you had lived for years
All I have are pictures ... and my many memories
That often are so painful...that never will be eased
I long to have you back with me...but know it won't come true
I will never have that life again...that life with me and you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Mother's Day Wish From Heaven
Dear Mr. Hallmark,
I am writing to you from heaven,
and though it must appear
A rather strange idea,
I see everything from here.
I just popped in to visit,
your stores to find a card
A card of love for my mother,
as this day for her is hard.
There must be some mistake I thought,
every card you could imagine
Except I could not find a card,
from a child who lives in heaven.
She is still a mother too,
no matter where I reside
I had to leave, she understands,
but oh the tears she's cried.
I thought that if I wrote you,
that you would come to know
That though I live in heaven now,
I still love my mother so.
She talks with me, and dreams with me;
we still share laughter too,
Memories our way of speaking now,
would you see what you could do?
My mother carries me in her heart,
her tears she hides from sight.
She writes poems to honor me,
sometimes far into the night
She plants flowers in my garden,
there my living memory dwells
She writes to other grieving parents,
trying to ease their pain as well.
So you see Mr. Hallmark,
though I no longer live on earth
I must find a way,
to remind her of her wondrous worth
She needs to be honored,
and remembered too
Just as the children of earth will do.
Thank you Mr. Hallmark,
I know you'll do your best
I have done all I can do;
to you I'll leave the rest.
Find a way to tell her,
how much she means to me
Until I can do it for myself,
when she joins me in eternity.
